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Post Info TOPIC: Help, I just dont know what to do.


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Help, I just dont know what to do.


My bdad and bbrother and bbrother wife and grown kids are going on a cruise, and they want me to go.
first of all, my youngest daughter is getting married at the end of the year. and I made a promise to myself that I cant go on any vacations before the wedding. because I dont want to be broke before the wedding.kwim? this is a 5 days trip to grand caymans and mexico. in may.
2) bbrother wife has said maybe 3 words to me since I have met her. so, she either very shy or she just dont like me. I cant tell.
3) matt my hubby said he cant get the time off to go. and said if I really want to go then go.
I just dont want to feel like a 5th wheel kwim.
my kids cant go either. it would just be me and them.
bdad really wants me to go and so does bbrother.
bdad said he would even pay my way and we can share a room. ( I'm not going if he pays my way)thats how bad they want me to go.
I have been sick over all of this.
4) bdad is 81 years old and I dont know how much time I have left with him.that is the only reason I was thinking I should go.. one minute I want to go, but then the next minute I just dont want to go with out my hubby.
please let me know what ya think.. plus I have never been any where without my hubby.

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Global Moderator

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It's really hard in reunion and the feelings of obligations emerge.  If you don't feel comfortable with it be honest with them that it's just not a good time to go for you. 

I DO know how you feel and finally learned that I cannot please everyone.  Maybe if you suggest another vacation next year when your whole family can go they might understand alittle better.

Hang in there.  And hugs to you!!

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Part of a MOD squad!!

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I agree with Duchie...maybe explain that after the wedding would be a better time for it.

Don't feel obligated to do anything your heart is not in 100 %...that's a given that it's not going to be nearly as much fun as it would be if you felt certain that you would enjoy it if you did go. Does that make sense??? EEK...seemed funny after typing it. LOL



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Resident Military Member Director

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see, i don't know what to tell you. My thing would be, he is getting on in years, you have to think....is his health good enough to were you can postpone it for next year? I honestly would hate for him to pass on and you hate yourself for NOT going on this vacation with him. Y aknow what I mean. I mean it is only 5 days and if you have the money to go and it wont make you broke, then I think you should go............
HOWEVER, I agree with Duchie too. You can't please everyone. If your heart isn't in it 100% (like Trina said) then you probably shouldn't go.



I am no help, I know. Sorry!

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Together Again


Member

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Well, I've made up my mind... After changing it 3 or 4 or 5 times! I'm gonna go on the cruise!! I've been sick to my stomach, tossing and turning over the decision. But, after driving my family crazy (and I'm sure you guys too...) I have finally decided to go! I really get along w/ my new birth family and know I want to make up for lost time. My family is relieved that I have made up my mind, so I can stop bugging them. But know I'll probably bug them about my shore excursions and how much fun I'll be having w/ out them!

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Global Moderator

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That's great Tami!!!!  I really hope that you have a wonderful time.  I know it was a hard decision for you to make. 

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Senior Member

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Tami, Sorry I'm a slow-poke on this topic.  Where was I when you posted this?  I have no clue.  But I think you won't regret your decision.  You will be creating some memories on your trip with your bdad and bbrother.  Enjoy it to it's fullest!

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me2.jpg Chelsea



Resident Military Member Director

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good choice. Take lots of pictures!! I can't wait to see them! Have a great time!

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Together Again


Celestial Moderator

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I think that is fantastic for you to go.  You could say it's a chance of a lifetime and worse comes to worse and something goes crazy, you can always find other things to do to keep you preoccupied.  Way to go girl! 


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Member

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Thanks everyone. now I cant wait to go. bbrother and I get along so well, we love to tease each other. I think I'm gonna have a ball with bdad and brother.

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Senior Member

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;) You already knew what I thought! LOL!

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Anne
www.maternitycorner.com
Mom to Ryan 11/05/98
Step-mom to Angela & Laura (My big kids!)

Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children. ~Charles R. Swindoll
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